long live the QUEEN
What if historically significant people posted on FMYLIFE.com?

srsly:

noonish:

“The other day I was trying to get all my friends for dinner and I ended up having to feed them both my blood and my body. One of them betrayed me now I am hung in between two thieves for apparently trying to be King of the Jews. Thanks Dad, FML.”

“Tried to go to the White people highschool today. They were literally all racist and I had to have cops escort me to my classes. FML.”

“Tried to get a job today, was told no Irish need apply and was told to go die from eating nothing but potatoes, if I was lucky. FML”

“Totally won some awesome Nobel prize, can’t really bask in my glory though, remember the pretty blue-green light that those substances gave off in the dark? Turns out they are bad for you. FML”

Re-Blog and add your own.

Today, I discovered the Philippines. Turns out they’re not down with that. I got killed by their leader, Lapu-Lapu. I got killed by a man named after a fish. FML.

Reblogged 1 month ago from srsly (originally from noonish)
257 notes
  1. nerdybynature reblogged this from imbrittanybitch and added:
    hey, hey. I’m a direct descendent of that fish/guy.
  2. imbrittanybitch reblogged this from longlivethequeen and added:
    haha thats the best one.
  3. apice3 reblogged this from noonish and added:
    Fun fact: The Jesus FML served as my default away message for a two week period this summer.
  4. noonish reblogged this from pele and added:
    Hey! I remember writing this! I thought everything on the internet immediately disappears. Cool that it came back up on...
  5. pele reblogged this from longlivethequeen
  6. noxious399 reblogged this from longlivethequeen and added:
    “Today, I told the Pope the truth that the Earth orbits the Sun and the Earth isn’t the center of our solar system. I...
  7. wookiegasm reblogged this from longlivethequeen and added:
    Today, I wrote the Constitution of the United States, and in it I specifically said, “All men are created equal.” It’s...
  8. longlivethequeen reblogged this from srsly
  9. leakysunglasses reblogged this from lolztobehad
  10. trepanationparty reblogged this from fmylife
  11. imblaaaacklikethaaaat reblogged this from fmylife
  12. sothishorseright reblogged this from map-the-seoul and added:
    Those are too clever. CAn’t make one to top or even equal that.
  13. flypaperairplanes reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    “Got into an all out war. Took way longer than expected, and there were no nucler weapons at all. FML.”
  14. rarelyaround reblogged this from fmylife
  15. feathers reblogged this from morgenstern
  16. mackenzierockit reblogged this from life-starts-now
  17. mello-beth reblogged this from fmylife
  18. helloimdorothy reblogged this from srsly
  19. sarashenanigans reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    Today, after going out of my way to avoid these guys, my driver drove past Gavrilo Princip eating a sandwich in...
  20. danathelaugh reblogged this from lolztobehad
  21. grilled-cheeese reblogged this from noonish and added:
    [not witty enough at this point...time (maybe ever)…leaving it
  22. runbarbierun reblogged this from srsly and added:
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG. LAPU LAPU FTW! =))
  23. bakitwhynande reblogged this from srsly
  24. srsly reblogged this from noonish and added:
    they’re not down with that. I got killed by their leader, Lapu-Lapu. I got killed by a man named after a fish. FML.
  25. theblackgryphon reblogged this from fmylife
  26. chingaling reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    “On tour in New York, I was feeling homesick for my lover and convinced him to fly from Paris to meet me. The next day,...
  27. rebirthofallison reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    LOLLERCAUST, I love these.
  28. austinspeaks reblogged this from yellowisfantastic and added:
    “So yesterday I moved into this pretty sweet town off the Gulf of Salerno in Italy to start my mosaic tile business....
  29. devaneyelliott reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    HAHA this is awesome.
  30. sheeeevvas reblogged this from fmylife
  31. kayhumptay reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    “I escaped an island, convinced my former soldiers to join me, and over threw the government of the country I used to be...
  32. life-starts-now reblogged this from fmylife
  33. pbjellyfish reblogged this from wring and added:
    It must be Thursday. FML.
  34. abenoit reblogged this from morgenstern and added:
    “So I lead the entire nation to victory against the Confederates AND I freed the slaves. Now I’m going to go see a play....
  35. yellowisfantastic reblogged this from fmylife
  36. briand316 reblogged this from actsofkindness
  37. actsofkindness reblogged this from fmylife
  38. thardcore reblogged this from fmylife
  39. typwrtr reblogged this from infinitebutterflies
  40. jayther reblogged this from placeholdertext
  41. highlifescenery reblogged this from shootthemoonerin and added:
    ”Today, my company sent me on a $440000 retreat, but, apparently we’d just been part of the bailout. I think the whole...
  42. kaeawc reblogged this from fmylife
  43. blurslur reblogged this from cjernigan and added:
    This is actually nice. “Today, I found out I was gonna get arrested and be shot by a firing range all because I wrote a...
  44. whoisthismariaperson reblogged this from fmylife
  45. meringuemaggie reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    “The other day I was trying to get all my friends for dinner and I ended up having to feed them both my blood and my...
  46. leejay reblogged this from sbcpacker4life and added:
    I used to be a somewhat successful rap artist, but after hosting an MTV show for a few years, now everyone just tells me...
  47. loveamy reblogged this from fmylife
  48. sbcpacker4life reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    After freeing thousands of people all I wanted to do was watch a play then some dude shot me in the back of the head....
  49. mwahglow reblogged this from fmylife
  50. shootthemoonerin reblogged this from highlifescenery and added:
    “Today, I found out that the guy who discovered America AFTER me, now has his own holiday. Good for you, asshole. FML.”
  51. wring reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    Someone start the literature version! I woke up this morning and realized I turned into a cockroach. FML.
  52. bethanyann reblogged this from fmylife
  53. vicix3 reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    Today I came home from work and got on a bus. I was tired. Some jerk ass wanted my seat. I refused. Now i’m being...
  54. crissyeatsradios reblogged this from deceptivelydeliciousblog
  55. alafleurdelage reblogged this from leahferrari
  56. leahferrari reblogged this from fmylife
  57. blushingskulls reblogged this from fmylife
  58. kudakitsune reblogged this from fmylife
  59. highlifescenery reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    ”Today, I tried to hack in the Democratic National Convention and do some really unconstitutional stuff. Now, the...
  60. lustinforlife reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    “After already running and losing once, I was finally elected President of the United States. While in office I was...
  61. morgenstern reblogged this from littleorphanammo and added:
    So i built this thing, it’s like a couple of lenses in a can, but i can see the stars with it, and i think i found out...
  62. krs10vray reblogged this from fmylife
  63. thenewrapunzel reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    “Today, while driving through Dallas with the top down, I found out the magic bullet is not just a really cool...
  64. zerokelvin reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    “I landed on what I thought was India. I spent the rest of my life trying to reclaim America as my own discovery. FML”
  65. infinitebutterflies reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    “i was elected the first black president. great. awesome la dee freakin da. its a time of war, social unrest, economy’s...
  66. nooneonthecornerhasswaglikeus reblogged this from fmylife
  67. boomkitty reblogged this from lolztobehad and added:
    fmylife:noonish:
  68. ciarrai84 reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    I did all sorts of historically great things for my country, like the Emancipation Proclamation and trying to end the...
  69. lolztobehad reblogged this from fmylife
  70. hexagramology reblogged this from -smart-tart- and added:
    MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! “I started hearing the voice of God who told me to dress up like a dude, cut my hair...
  71. sometimeslifeisjustshit reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    Me and My family were hiding, It was bloody good hiding at that, I have always been good at hide and seek. We had been...
  72. katharinec reblogged this from cjernigan and added:
    In 1989, someone shot and killed a police officer in Georgia, and based on eye witness testimony alone - no physical...
  73. deceptivelydeliciousblog reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    ”Today I tried to kill the entire Jewish race. I ended up killing myself instead. FML”
  74. rosasparks reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    I worked my ass off, all day at work, then headed to the bus station to catch my bus home. I got on the bus, took my...
  75. beforeyougowillyouwakeme reblogged this from fmylife
  76. myunreality reblogged this from fmylife and added:
    ”Today, one of my Pagan wives asked me to make a sacrafice to her god. Well, because I love her I decided to go against...
  77. -smart-tart- reblogged this from littleorphanammo and added:
    out as a princess, caught...czar’s attention, married him, allowed his overthrow and...
  78. audiolove reblogged this from fmylife
  79. largecokenoice reblogged this from fmylife
  80. theanswerisalwaysyes reblogged this from fmylife
  81. mofosluv reblogged this from fmylife
  82. cjernigan reblogged this from fmylife
  83. cutsonpaperhearts reblogged this from fmylife
  84. fmylife reblogged this from noonish
  85. rosasparks reblogged this from haguenite and added:
    I worked my ass off, all day at work, then headed to the bus station to catch my bus home. I got on the bus, took my...
  86. noonish posted this